I do not know where to start in writing this post...
It has been such an emotional rollercoaster these last few weeks. I have spent the most part in bed, wishing the days away. My life has been turned upside down.
I really believed William and I had got it right this time, that we were going to live happy-ever-after. I had never been so happy, so in love, so determined to work through whatever was thrown our way. Then a secret was discovered and it changed everything. I had gone from looking at this man and seeing someone I adored to seeing someone who I felt I no longer knew. I made the decision to leave. This was far from easy. He was meant to be my husband. He was my best friend, my soul mate. We had planned our childrens names, what kind of house we wanted to buy... Three and a half years of love, laughter and adventures all ended. All my dreams and hopes for the future gone.
Knowing that I have made the right decision in the long run is all that is keeping me going. There hasn't been a day that has passed when I haven't thought of William and felt sad. I miss him terribly and I don't expect that feeling to go away any time soon. I can't even begin to imagine what my future now holds, its too scary without him. My whole world has collapsed around me.
I am truly devastated, I feel lost, empty and hopeless.
As the tears roll down my cheeks I can no longer even muster up a single thought...
Take care for now